The winter of my discontent

Good evening, children.

I promised an update, and by gum I am keeping my word. (From the field, no less, as I am at this moment sitting in Cantrell waiting for Shane's recital to begin.)

The past few weeks have been tolerably mediocre, so until this point I have felt somewhat comfortable with not posting.

A handful of girls have decided to start a new fad, and unlike my pushing for big strands of pearls and floral pins, it is neither fabulous nor welcome.

What is this atrocity?

Calf length leggings worn under cotton work-out shorts, commonly known as "Sofees," with Uggs.

Not only is this not cute, ladies, it's not doing anything to keep you warm. (It's 30 degrees out, in case you haven't noticed.) You look like morons. It's as simple as that.

Don't want to bulk up? Understandable. You don't have to. Please take note of Jessica Taylor and Andrea Kesterson, who are both known to wear sweater dresses with fitted boots, or Abbie Dedmon, who wears a nicely fitted wool jacket daily. Layer with either urban sensibilities, a la Elizabeth Chrisman, or with a bohemian vibe like Lizzie Oliver.

Call me. I'll take you shopping. Partly because I care, but mostly because I'm tired of looking at your idiotic asses walking all around my campus.

Don't want to change your moronic habits? Transfer to OU with that bullshit. You'll feel right at home, I assure you.

At dinner tonight I was made aware of the fact that focusing on your clothing is not sufficient. I have made comments here and there about unacceptable behaviors and hygiene, but a certain young lady has forced me to talk about makeup.

I realize, honey, that today was probably your first time. It takes practice.

First of all, you are WHITE, baby girl. That means Queen Collection foundations are not for you. Try a porcelain shade next time, rather than tangerine.

Second, get rid of your "Barbie's My First Makeup Kit." Pale blue glitter eye-shadow was fashionable when I was in 7th grade (though I made fun of people who wore it then). Today it is the late 90s cosmetic equivalent of Zubaz and Crocs.

You're an adult now. Chocolate brown. Charcoal gray. Plum. Wine. These are your new eye basics. Learn to love them.

"Fasions fade, style is eternal.
-Yves Saint Laurent

Une Mois

Sorry, children. My B.

One month later and . . . . I'm not really updating.

Classes, which, contrary to popular belief, I do attend and complete assignments for, have been getting hectic.

Here's the plan [someone please keep me on track] [thank you Donna for the constant badgering]: weekly updates. Scheduled for Fridays. Does that sound ok to you? It had better, because you don't have a choice in the matter.

Tomorrow plan on reading about the newest campus trend.

"Fashions fade, style is eternal."
-Yves Saint Laurent

Traj

I lost my locket. My aunt gave it to me on the most important day of my life: my birth.

Small. Gold. Heart-shaped. Starburst pattern on the cover. Small diamond in the center. Empty.

If you find it, please keep it safe for me.
If I see it on your neck prepare for a slow, painful death. [That was mostly hyperbolic. Mostly.]

I'm too upset about this to post properly. Tomorrow, children. Tomorrow.

Oh. Em. Ef. Gee.

It has been far too long. I am so very sorry.

Midterm work + fall break + a strange bout of exhaustion has been keeping me from posting. I apologize.
Wednesday before fall break [I realize this is extremely tardy] I spotted a denim bucket hat. I couldn't get a good shot since the wearer was too many rows ahead of me in chapel. Suffice it to say that she resembled a 90s TV teenager some of you may remember. . . .



2Pair will hence be named 3Pair. Lady apparently went to Wal-Mart and scored herself a pair of black basket-ball shorts. [Her equivalent of an LBD, mayhaps?] I suppose I could give props for wardrobe expansion, but I'm not going to. I'll break down and give kudos when she wears jeans.

Today marked the first legitimately cold day of Fall! I am ecstatic!

However, I still don't think that hoodies are acceptable outerwear all of the time. I realize that for some of you it is your element, [Mr. gray hoodie, vintage denim, flip flops, I'm talking to you] but I don't believe it would kill you good folks to invest in a wool peacoat. [I believe they're better protection from the elements anyway. Hoodies don't really cut it when it's snowing.] Or a "leather" bomber jacket. [Cori Fouts, yours was totes adorbs, BT Dubs.] Or layer a sweater underneath a blazer. [It can look very Ivy League when done right.]

I also realize that we are on our way into wellie season. No one likes cold, wet feet. I understand this completely. I beg you, if you wear wellies, please wear them well. Pretty please. Today I saw no less than ten ladies walking around with their jeans bunched up at the top of their boots. NOT cute.

So. Quick tutorial concerning wellies.

DO NOT:
*Wear with wide-legged capris.
*Cuff jeans over the top.
*Bunch jeans over the top.
*Wear with nothing but a mini-skirt on bottom. [Good rule of thumb: if it's cold enough to warrant a jacket and a lack of flip flops, it's too cold for bare legs.]

DO:
*Wear with fitted jeans tucked inside.
*Pair with skirts/dresses and tights.

Yes:


No:


Yes:


No:


Yes:


NO!:


Bottom yes, top no:


NO! NO! NO!:


And HELLS NO!:



This winter I'm looking for some lovely knits, jewel tones, structured outerwear, and fashion-forward yet functional footwear. Please make me proud, children.

Personal pics and further update later. Inspiration competition photo tomorrow. For those of you who saw my jacket today, you get a head start.

"Fashions fade, style is eternal."
- Yves Saint Laurent

Minor Backlash

I'm not going to rant twice. You can read all about this on the Bitchery.

"Fashions fade, style is eternal."
-Yves Saint Laurent

Neglect

Oh. Em. Ef. Gee.

Sorry for the unintentional lie. Friends?

The fashion front has been dismal this week. That could be due to the fact that I wasn't really able to pay close attention.

Some highlights:

Wednesday:

Gaby in an olive cable-knit dress. Very cute.

Thursday:

Andrea in a slate cowl neck dress and plum shrug. And Ty . . . . being Ty.



Purple striped hoodie over a black knee-length dress over boot-cut jeans.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

We have long since moved past the dress-over-jeans revolution. If it's super short with fitted jeans I can handle it. This just isn't acceptable. Even in Oklahoma.

Outside of the fact that dresses over jeans hasn't been in style since the first half of this decade, the proportions are completely wrong here. Nothing is fitted and since everything has volume the result is . . . . . well . . . . . . you know. If you are an anti-tiny girl, bigger clothes aren't hiding anything [if that was the intent behind this ensemble]. They only make you look . . . . . drumroll . . . . . bigger. Shocking that more fabric could look like more fabric, huh?

Now DO NOT wear clothes that are a size too small, that certainly won't help anything. You just need to find pieces that fit you well: close to the body, but not cinching.

Friday:

Cereal bowl aside, Ernest is just plain fab.
He's got that Cali ease [probably because he's straight out of CA] that I love so very much. [The first time I met this kid he was wearing 7 For All Mankind. L'amour.]

I told you, lads, that you can look great in jeans and tees. While I adore them, you don't have to wear vests and ties to impress me. At this point I'll settle for regular showering.

The promised rant:

You all should know that while I love people to look fabulous, what I love more is beautiful behavior. Courtesy is chic.

There has been an outbreak of PDA [and god knows what else] on campus this semester. I am dying to drop names right now, but that would be wrong.

Certain couples like to snog in various places around campus [mainly the benches near Herrick] after the sun goes down. I can handle that, so long as I don't have to look at it.

There are other couples, however, who feel it appropriate to feel each other up during lunch hours in the 'Ho. NOT ACCEPTABLE. At all.

Save that for nighttime at Lake Holdhercloser or any of the numerous church parking lots in the Bethany area.

I know you are so very much "in love" right now [I'm sure with your extensive world experience you truly know what that means], and I know that you want to express that "love" in a manner as close as possible to sex while still being able to call yourselves good Christians. However, you may not have noticed this while you were sharing that piece of Doublemint and rubbing each others' inner thighs, some of us are trying to eat.

I, personally, couldn't care less what you do with each other. Have threesomes, dive into S&M, try your hand at bestiality, go munging, whatever you like. Just quit touching each other in my presence in the daylight hours. I don't go up to the caf to watch live amateur porn. I go with the hope that there will be something meat-free and edible. Something that won't make me gag.

I never thought something could make my stomach turn more than the vittles from Sodex'ho. Your antics have proved otherwise.

"Fashions fade, style is eternal."
- Yves Saint Laurent

EDIT:

Floral tights from Target?

Someone in the fashion blogosphere is rocking them.

Apologies

No update for yesterday or today. I'm sorry, loves.

I've been sick. [I even wore a hoodie and trackpants to dinner tonight. Cecily French called me on it. Thanks for making me feel like an utter fraud and failure, Ces. In my defense, my hoodie is presh.]

I promise a synopsis tomorrow. Plus! A rant. I know how much everyone adores those.

For now, Earl Gray and bed.

"Fashions fade, style is eternal."
-Yves Saint Laurent